My Life as a 20 Something

My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing  (James 1:2-4).

If you are one of my closer friends this year, then you know how trying of a year it has been for me. This was my first year out of college, my first time fully taking care of myself, my first job in my major, my first year of adulting.

My intent of this post is to be authentic and offer what I have learned over the past 9 months. I've divided my "lessons" into sections below.

MOVING AWAY:

In August, I moved to a town 200 miles away from my family and a 100 miles away from my college friends. Everyone I knew was a few hours drive away, which is not the kind of driving I like to do in my fairly unstable car. In the natural, I was alone. However, in my loneliness, God was there. Life Tip #1- Whenever you feel lonely, turn to God. ( Deuteronomy 31:6). The amazing thing is that God is just a prayer away. In the times I felt like my heart would break and tears would overflow my eyes, God was there to wrap his loving embrace over me.  (Jeremiah 29:12-13). People are not meant to be alone. While I am half of an introvert, I know that I don't like to be alone every second of my life. A great way to break loneliness is to not just spend time with Jesus, but to also spend time with people. 
So in order to have friends, you have to make an effort (Proverbs 18:24). So, get out there! Go to socials. Be friendly. Start a conversation with a stranger. (Hint: Church is a great place to meet people. Christians are supposed to be friendly. So go and find you some friends :)

FINDING A CHURCH HOME:
I knew that I needed to find a place where I could GROW spiritually and make some friends. I took some recommendations from people, went on Google to find places, and hopped in  the car every Sunday to find somewhere for me. There are plenty of good churches in my town, but the ones I went to were not great for me. I was at a new church almost every week for about 2 months. My advice for those searching for a church home is to keep looking. Do not give up. Do not settle (you can't play with your spiritual life). Do not forsake the gathering of saints (Hebrews 10:25). In other words, keep going to church even if you haven't found what you're looking for. When I would go to churches that may have fit 3 out of the 4 of my requirements, I would ask God if that was it. Every time, I would feel a stirring in my spirit and move on. Life Tip #2- If you don't feel peace about something, don't do it. 
 I was finally led to my church home on their last day in their old building. It met all of my requirements. While it took some time to find, I know that it was nothing but God who led me there. It truly is the perfect fit for me at this point in my life. God can help you find your place of worship too (Ephesians 3:20).

QUARTER LIFE CRISIS:
This term is defined as  "a period of life ranging from twenties to thirties, in which a person begins to feel doubtful about their own lives, brought on by the stress of becoming an adult." Not going to lie, I have felt this "quarter life crisis" more times than I can count.  This transition from college to career life has not been as smooth as I would have hoped. God tells us directly in his word that we will have trouble, but we also have Him (John 16:33). One of the serious things I'm learning in this season is to trust God. More times than I can even count, I've tossed my hands in the air and felt hopeless. Truth be told, I am uncertain on what God's specifically telling me to do. I'm not sure what my next move is. I have no idea how my life will look like in 5,10,15, or 20 years. One of my favorite, not so favorite, prayers has been "God, why am I here?" Life Tip # 3 God has a purpose for everyone. Everyone is called to worship God and bring people to Christ (Matthew 28:19-20). But I'm stuck a little bit more on the specifics. 
Trusting God means that you'll go where ever he tells you or to stay put if needed. Instead of always praying, "God, why am I here?" Tell God, "I will TRUST you while I am here." No, I'm not exactly sure where my life is headed. But as long as I continue to do life with Jesus, I know that I am all good. 

 LIFE IS A SURPRISE:
Life tip #4- Prepare for the unexpected. I would have not have imagined that both of my pets would need surgery, I would get a ton of my clothes stolen,  or my car's transmission would start leaking all within the past 8 months. If there's one thing that I've learned this past year, is that money goes fast. I have gotten $80 out of the ATM on Wednesday and on Saturday I'm trying to figure out where it went. Life tip #5 God takes care of his kids (Psalm 37:25). Some of the expenses I mentioned above, God sent people to bless me. That's a whole other blog post, but God will take care of the big and small of your life. 

 COMPARISON:
From about the age of 9 or so, there's been this ideology of how my life will go. It's something along the lines of a Nicolas Spark's movie. Life tip #6 Stop it! No like seriously, stop it. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing with having goals and ideas on how your life will look in a few years. But my problem was that it sort of became an obsession. I spent too much time in dreamland and not enough in reality. God knows our heart's desires (Proverbs 37:4). He gets it. He who created the heart knows what yours holds. Facebook has not been my friend as of late. I sometimes need to take a step back because I end up creeping on friend's profiles. I see them traveling the world, loving their jobs, getting married, living in beautiful places, and appearing to have the time of their lives. Almost everyone wants to appear like they have a seemingly perfect life with only minor problems. When I post pictures on Facebook, it's me being surrounded by friends with a smile on my face. It's not my usual everyday life where I'm on Youtube for hours watching pranks, eating fast food, or hanging out with my pets. 

Life tip #7 Be content with your portion. I'm not saying that you shouldn't change your life if needed. What I am saying is that what God places in your hands, be faithful over it and joyous (Luke 16:10). Bloom where you are planted. I shouldn't get jealous because one of my Facebook friends are getting married or buying new cars (Exodus 20:17). I should be thanking God for my singleness, for a roof over my head, and for my car that gets me to point A  to point B. I'm so blessed, and I miss this fact by focusing on others blessings. Life tip #8 Comparison is the thief of joy. When you start feeling ughhh about your life, log off of Facebook and get into prayer mode. 

MENTAL HEALTH:
I've had  problems with depression in my past. It was a spirital battle (Ephesians 6:10-18). After getting serious with God about 6 years ago, I've only had one serious relapse that lasted a couple of weeks. God is my medicine. When I was irrational and not mentally stable, it was because my eyes were not on my maker (Psalm 121:1-2). This first official year of adulting has been one my most challenging seasons. The pressures of work and life left crippled, unable to get out of bed, with no desire to eat.  I can honestly say that what I thought would break me only bent me closer to God (Romans 8:28). 

Life tip #9 Get up and keep moving. I thank God for my animals. The fact that I have two little ones to take care helped to get me out of bed some days. Overall though, get help if you need it. There is nothing wrong with seeking professional help. It is also nice to have people in your life who will listen to you talk about the same thing for hours. (Thank you for the people who did this for me!) The best help is Jesus. Pray to him, get in your word, keep worship music on (Psalm 94, Psalm 91). Tell the devil to take his ugly paws off of your life and  your mind, and give it to God (don't pick it back up). 

KNOW WHO YOU ARE:
This year, more so than college, I've questioned who I am. Life tip #10 Remember you identity is in God.  When people used of the devil try to tell you who you are, know what God's word says.  (Check this site out-- https://bible.org/article/who-does-god-say-i-am). Your morals and beliefs may be challenged, and you'll be required to self-assess. Know what you believe and stick to it. (It better be the things of Christ. LBS). 

No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead Philippians 3:13---and sometimes that's all you can truly do. 

Keep Christ First.

Peace and Love. 

Courtney